1.21 Giga-Whats??
is the sixth episode of the series. The title is a reference to the movie, Back to the Future. Synopsis Church catches up to Donut, who he eventually realizes is not Sarge. His armor charred black, Tucker finally emerges from the teleporter, startling the other two. When Donut insists that he is only a private, Tucker concludes that he has traveled back in time and has met a past version of Sarge. With the Warthog, Grif and Simmons then ambush Church and Tucker, pinning them behind a rock by using the Warthog's mounted chaingun. Realizing the situation, the Rookie decides to use the tank to save his comrades. Transcript Grif: Oh crap... It... it's Donut. And he's got something... (zooms in, sees it's the flag) It looks like... Simmons, get the Warthog. Simmons: Heh, you mean the Puma? Scene changes to Church running up to Donut, pointing his gun at Donut Church: Freeze! Donut: Hey, why the hell are you shooting at me? You coulda hit me, dick! Church: Can it. Don't try to play stupid with me, Sarge I know who ya are We've been spying on you for three weeks now. Donut: I just got here two hours ago. And I'm not a Sergeant, I'm a Private. Church: Wait a minute you're not the Sergeant! Donut: Yeah, that's what I just said. Church: Well then how the hell did you manage to steal our flag? Donut: Steal? I have no idea what the hell you're talking about! Tucker appears between them, through the teleporter, now wearing black armor Tucker: THREE! Church: JESUS! Donut: HOLY SHIT! Who is this guy? Church: What in the hell!? Tucker? Is that you? Tucker: How did you get up here ahead of me? Donut: And what's with that black shit on your armor? Tucker: Hey. Freeze Sarge! Donu'''t: Would you stop calling me a Sergeant, I'm still just a Private. '''Tucker: The Sarge is still a Private? Oh. My. God. The teleporter sent me back in time. Scene change to Grif and Simmons getting in the jeep, with upbeat music playing Grif: Sorry Lopez, we need the jeep. Simmons: I'll take gunner... (takes gunner) ...let's roll. (they drive off) Don't worry Lopez, I'll bring her back in one piece. Grif: How do you turn off the fucking radio in this car? Scene changes back to the Blues and Donut Tucker: Look, I know you don't know me, but you have to believe what I'm about to tell you. Some time in your future I get stationed here in Blood Gulch, and we meet. And this guy here, he gets promoted to Sargeant of the Red Army, and we spy on them. And they get this new jeep, and I'm all like "There is no way you can pick up chicks in a tank!" Church: Tucker? What the fuck are you babbling about? Tucker: I know all this sounds crazy, but he eventually becomes a Sargeant, and then one day we get a tank, and he comes and steals a flag while we're distracted. Donut: Is this guy a retard? Church: (jeep's music gets progressively louder during this speech) Red? Shut up. Tucker? Listen to me. Ya haven't gone back in time, okay? This is the guy who stole the flag, he's just not the Sargeant. Turns out, he's just some dumb rookie, who happens to have the same color armor as him. He got in somehow, just g... for God's sakes, WHAT IS THAT MUSIC!? Warthog jumps over the hill, right by Church Grif: Woohoo! Tucker: Holy shit! Church: Son of a bitch! Run! Jesus! Run! Tucker: The jeep followed me back in time! Grif hops out of the Warthog and starts firing at Church and Tucker as they run away. Simmons is yelling and firing at them Church: Ah! Git! The ah! Eeh! Grif: What the hell is going on here? Donut: You know what, I honestly have no idea what's going on. I think everyone in this canyon is absolutely insane. Grif: How did you get their flag? Donut: I don't know, I just asked for it. Grif: Wait, that worked? Donut: I guess. Is it not supposed to? Grif: I don't know, we, we never even thought to try that. Just take the flag to the base, I'll explain there. Donut: Not until someone tells me what the fuck is goi- Grif: There's no time to explain, rookie! Just take the flag, and go to base! I'll explain everything there. Donut: Fine...! Donut starts running through the Gulch '' '''Grif': Hungh, back to our base, dumbass! Donut: Uh, I know, I just got turned around, that's all. Simmons: (In background) That's right! That's right, I got your ass! Get off your ass and run, you cock bites! Right now! Yeah, not so pretty when you gotta run are you! Yeah, that's right. Stay there. You know where you flag is? We're gonna get you! Come on! Don't be a wimp! Come on, blue! Come on, get out there! I've got a whole barrel of love to shoot you with! Come on! Get out now! Yeah, come on out! I know you like this! Come out where I can get you! Come on! Don't be a wimp! Come on, blue! Be tough, get out there! Cut to the Rookie looking at Church and Tucker through the sniper rifle Rookie: Oh man, that's not good. (pans the rifle to the jeep) Oh my God that jeep has a really big gun. The Rookie puts down the sniper rifle '' '''Rookie': Stay here... Tank... Stay here... Tank... Ah, screw it. (runs off to the tank) Cut to Church and Tucker behind the rock. Simmons is firing and yelling at them. Church: Well, we'll just wait here. That thing's gotta run outta bullets some time... Simmons: (In background) Yeah, get going, take that! I know you like that there, come out! Come here! Poke your head up! Come on blue! Get your head out there! Video Category: Season 1 Category: Episodes